


here with me in the sunshine

by em_the_gem



Series: not-so-single-parents [2]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: (shameless references to kpop songs), Alec centric, Family Feels, Fluff, M/M, Soft Mornings, lapslock, love love love, so much love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-22
Updated: 2019-02-22
Packaged: 2019-11-03 20:47:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,196
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17884949
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/em_the_gem/pseuds/em_the_gem
Summary: alec wakes up to a Bad Day™. thankfully, he has the sun, his husband and his kids by his side.





	here with me in the sunshine

_But I need you_  
_Every morning, every night_  
_And when I see you_  
_I am whole and loving life_

\-- rationale 'loving life'

 

❇  ❈  ❇  ❈ ❇

 

 

he’s not entirely sure what it is that wakes him.

maybe it’s the sun streaming in through a crack in the curtains, warming up his chest through his sleepshirt, cutting across his cheekbone until it reaches his eyes, making everything a warm orange.

maybe it’s the noises from the backyard outside the window cracked open on its hinges where he’s able to make up two boys’ voices - one darker than the other - and something that sounds like a ball being thrown and vaguely, just vaguely, a spoken _hermano, no!_

and maybe it’s his internal clock, telling him he’s slept well through the morning and possibly also breakfast, because suddenly his stomach rumbles and then he groans, rolls onto his side and curls up around something soft. something soft that starts licking up his neck and snuffs a wet nose into his ear.

“baldur, no. not today.”

because today is a bad day. a bad day, capital b, capital d and the fancy, tiny trademark symbol that rafael has started using whenever he texts alec about _his_ bad days. and it really sucks that today is a bad day, because it’s march first. the first day of spring. and alec is having a bad day.

baldur, who got offended by his rejection, skips off the bed and leaves him cold in the morning sun. he whines and spreads out spread eagle on the bed.

“noo, come back.” and that’s when the door creaks and he blinks an eye open to see magnus peeking in. he’s smiling softly in the warm orange light, making him glow like the sun.

“good morning sleepyhead, how are you feeling?” he slips in while baldur sneaks out and drops on to the bed where alec’s made space for him. he kisses him softly on the shoulder, careful not to touch him in ways that might be unwanted. touch sometimes is on alec’s bad days, but not today. today they’re welcomed.

“mhmm,” alec murmurs and rolls to his side, curling around magnus like a sunflower to the sun. “‘s a bad day, i’m sorry.”

“don’t be sorry, alexander. we’ve talked about this. do you want some coffee? tea?” with a soothing voice and a soothing hand through alec’s hair, magnus has become one of his favorite people to help lure the bad days out and let the good days in.

“in a minute, ‘m very comfortable,” alec says, snuggling closer and finding immense comfort in the woolen sweater magnus is wearing. “how are the kids. talk to me about the kids.”

magnus chuckles and sinks further into the bed, makes himself comfortable against alec. “max woke rafael up at seven this morning. i thought i was going to have to go down and tell them to quiet down when they accidentally turned on the surround sound in the living room, blasting some, i don’t know, korean pop music? but then it stopped almost as soon as it had started. when i came down around eight they’d already taken baldur out for his morning walk and they were, they were doing their homework?” he sounds as if he can’t really believe the words coming out of his mouth. it’s followed by a chuckle.

alec smiles against his neck and lifts his head up on his chest, ear against his heart and nudges him to keep going.

“rafael has his SATs on the 9th and i think max is helping him with flashcards. at this rate i think max is able to skip some grades and go straight to college.”

“if that’s what he wants.”

“indeed, if that’s what he wants.”

they don’t talk too much about their kids’ futures. somehow that spikes anxiety in alec, something that most likely roots in his own father’s determination to control alec’s every move and alec’s own eagerness to please.

it had been a thing once - a thing, capital t - a thing that happened whenever magnus and rafael talked about college and rafael’s future. they’d sat at dinner when rafael offhandedly had mentioned his upcoming senior project when alec had lost feeling in his fingers and tongue. he’d excused himself to go dry heaving into the toilet.

so they don’t talk about it. or they do, but with careful words. they also don’t talk much about how their boys have grown so much these past 6 years they’ve been a family, ever since magnus and alec swore to be the other’s in front of their family and friends in their backyard.

“max has been talking about you. they have career day at school next week, he wants to bring you.”

that makes something in alec stir and it’s like the room becomes a little bit brighter. he rises up on one arm to look down on magnus, finally meeting his warm, brown eyes. they’re smiling at each other.

“he does?” alec peeps out, can finally feel the clutches around his chest loosen up.

“of course he does, he adores you. you’re his father,” magnus says matter-of-factly, reaching up to brush alec’s bangs out of his eyes. his hand linger on his cheek.

“so are you,” alec retorts, looks at him a little sternly, wants to make sure magnus understands this. sure, on the adoption paper it’s alec’s name stated, but under this roof and anywhere else he’s equally max’s father, as alec is rafael’s.

“i know, i know,” it comes shyly from magnus, who blushes and pinches alec’s cheek.

“he admires you too you know? when we first moved here, i could see it in his eyes. the way they lit up. i was afraid he’d actually choose you over me,” he says and magnus looks at him with soft eyes.

they adjust themselves on the bed so that magnus sits against the headboard and alec next to him, holding his hands, fiddling with the gold wedding band on his finger.

“have i told you how glad i am that you choose to stay?”

“only every day for the past 6 years, my love,” alec drawls and leans in.

they kiss for a while, so long that the streak of sunlight moves from the bed and onto the wall behind them, shining on the pictures on the wall. pictures of moments from the past 6 years they’ve shared together.

there’s a picture of max from his first day of junior high when he was 12. there’s a picture of rafael in a school production of dickens’ “oliver twist” when he was 15. there’s a picture of maryse and luke’s honeymoon to colombia. there’s a picture of alec and magnus’ honeymoon with the boys on a cruise ship in the caribbean. there’s a picture of alec and magnus on their wedding day.

“you know,” magnus says, pulling away, lips pink and a little shiny. “you are a good father. the kids love you so much.”

alec looks at him, really looks at him and wonders. wonders how he got so lucky to meet magnus in this world, got to fall in love with him, got to marry him, got to raise his kids with him. he smiles and nods. he does know he’s a good father, but it’s nice to be reminded of it sometimes. especially on bad days.

“and they love _you_.” he’s about to lean in again when there’s a knock on the door.

“are you having sex?” comes a muffled voice from outside the door.

“raf!” another voice shrieks, unmistakably max’s. alec and magnus look at each other and grin.

“we’re decent!” they call in unison and part a little to make room for them.

“is dad okay?” comes rafael’s voice hesitantly. still, after 6 years, the word ‘dad’ out of rafael’s mouth makes alec feel impossibly fond of the boy.

“dad is okay,” he calls out and the door swings open and max bolts in the room to swing his arms around alec. he can’t find it in his heart to complain that his 12-year old son still wants to cuddle up to him once in a while, and especially on his bad days.

“get off of him, you dumb dumb, when i said dad needs cuddles i didn’t mean from you,” rafael says from the door, a repressed laugh in his voice.

max laughs into alec’s ear and crawls off of him to settle next to magnus who smiles at him.

rafael sits down on the bed too, and the baby boy, with brown curls and blue eyes, in his arms reaches his arms out when he sees alec.

“dada,” he gurgles and wrestles his way out of rafael’s grip to crawl towards alec.

“hey sam, hey sammie,” alec coos at the 2-year old and takes him into his arms and close to his chest. the tiny, warm body dissolves the last of darkness in alec’s chest and for the first time in a few days his smile comes easy.

they’d adopted sam two years ago after four years of marriage. max and rafael had been easy friends in the beginning, but it’d taken them some time to understand that this was a bit more than just an extended sleepover. and then rafael had started showing signs of what alec recognized as depression, and when he’d started high school it had spiralled into episodes of anxiety. alec had taken him to his first therapy session, and he still goes sometimes when the days are bad. capital d, capital b.

and then magnus’ practice had caught attention in chicago and he had been whisked off to teach a semester at med school there, and life at home had been hectic but also just what alec had needed to not go insane from not having a daily job. but then again, he’d turned down a position at the local hospital, too afraid he’d start working too much again. so he spent his days walking the dog, taking care of his family and keeping his husband happy. and he loved every second of it.

sam grabs onto alec’s sleepshirt, soft with wear, and snuggles into it. alec catches magnus’ eyes over his head and a wordless declaration of love and gratitude flow through the invisible bond between them.

“he woke up from his nap and baldur was out, so we figured it’d be safe to enter. that you were better,” max pipes up from where he’s now slumped against magnus’ side, snuggled into his papa.

and that… that tightens something in alec again because, “of course it’s safe, of course it’s safe to enter. it always is. you have to know that. i’ll always be there for you. for both of you. for all three of you!” alec assures them and feels magnus’ gaze on him. “i’m your father, it’s my job to be there for you when and if you need me.”

they nod in unison, all four of them. sam is in his own world, too small to really know what is going on.

“god, you’re so sappy, i can’t wait to move to college,” rafael says with feign disgust and makes a move to get up. max kicks his leg out, aimed at rafael and mutters something in spanish, something rafael without doubt has taught him and something alec is certain he doesn’t want to know what means.

rafael grips his ankle and pulls his leg until max is lying flat on his back on the bed, cramped between his parents.

“boys, not in the bedroom. not around your brother.” magnus looks at them, unable to hide his smile.

the boys look at sam, still in alec’s embrace, and lean in to coo and tickle him. “sorry sammie, we’ll get out of your hair.”

they leave and sam babbles loudly and reaches for magnus who scoots closer. he slips an arm around alec and rests his head against alec’s shoulder to get a better look at their son. _their_ son.

“do you remember when you told me you wanted kids? more kids?” magnus murmurs, rubs the back of alec’s neck in slow circles. “remember how you thought i didn’t and you thought you had to sway me?”

“i remember you saying ‘ _this is, by far, the dumbest thing you’ve ever done_ ’ when i’d spent blood, sweat and tears on that dinner. it was very rude you know!” magnus laughs at him with kind eyes and kisses his cheek.

the boy in his arms looks up and smiles with his gums and the few teeth starting to pop out. it’s a nice view and a nice way to start the day, even if the day is halfway over.

alec nudges his husband’s cheek up with his nose and their eyes lock. magnus’ eyes, alec think, is his eighth wonder of the world.

“i love you, magnus lightwood-bane.”

“i love you too, alexander lightwood-bane.”

 

the streak of sunlight has reached their dresser upon which stands a bouquet of dried flowers from their wedding, a mickey mouse figurine from their honeymoon cruise and a family portrait from last year: all five of them and baldur.

**Author's Note:**

> title from 'loving life' by rationale
> 
> find me here!  
> [+twt](https://twitter.com/autumknj)  
> [+cc](https://curiouscat.me/kaarlighed)  
> [+tumblr](http://alecsgideon.tumblr.com)  
> 


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